"My mother was of the sky, my father was of the earth, but I am of the universe and you know what its worth, I am lonely. Wanna die. If I am dead already girl you know the reason why." The Stones :)
The other day a good friend of mine comes upstairs to lounge and admits that a girl that I thought was chill, is not coming because my old room mate and people I used to hang out with all the time, tells everyone asking, that I give off bad vibes. Bad Vibes: meaning all uncomfortable, uneasy, unsafe feelings. Bad vibes were those cautious "stay away, don't do it, don't trust it, watch out, be careful, keep on your toes" instincts that alerted us that something was not okay. Of course this was blurted out to me, I could have cared less that some chick I barely knew was coming to chill. However, it made me think. I think almost every person thinks I am sketchy or that I give off bad vibes. At first I was offended and I still am. These certainly were not people who should be talking about me, since that was why I stopped hanging out with them. Not to mention they kept asking me to come down and hang out and that the very person I don't wanna see, they hate. "Fuck Mike," they say, "dude, Jolene, everyone hates him." Since they hang out with him every day still, I am gonna go with that is pretty sketchy, hence my non-participation. But maybe they have a point.
Maybe I seem sketchy. I don't mean to be. I tell the truth about anyone. I will tell someone I don't like them, but will say it with a smile on my face and maybe that is just it. I don't mind being honest, but I am not trying to start physical fights. In fact I am not trying to start a fight at all, but when I feel strongly about a person I am not going to hang around and let them keep screwing me over. Especially if they make me uncomfortable. That's true with everyone though. It hardly makes me the psychotic one. I have a mind of my own, how outrageous, will someone PLEASE alert the church elders!?
The interesting thought process this led me to, was that these people love drama. Any drama. Which made me laugh eventually. They had nothing to really say about me. Which is surprising, all people can do it focus all their energy on making up anything to cause drama. I have bad vibes? hahaha sheesh. Sounds like it.
It's pretty pathetic.
